Tuesday, May 19, 2020

FRIENDS : The one in Quarantine - END

Rachel : Oh my god. This is bad, very bad

Chandler : What happened? Did your boss die to Corona

Rachel : I wish, instead I am laid off. They no longer want me back when the office reopens. And I don’t get the salary any more and now I can’t find any new job

Joey : Now you know my pain. No job and no salary

Phoebe : Thank god I don’t have a job to get laid off

Chandler : No one can fire you if you don’t have a job in the first place. Intelligent.

Monica : I doubt people would eat at any restaurant ever again. I might lose my job as well

Ross : Come on guys, it’s not the end of the world. These Pandemics are common and the Human race surviving from pandemics is also common. Don’t you guys know about the deadly plague in 1920s

Chandler : We weren’t born then Ross

Ross : Neither Am I. In fact there are quite a few Pandemics in Human history. Archeological evidences shows pandemics dated as far as 3000 B.C

Chandler : Ross, Let’s deal with one Pandemic at a time.

Joey : Come on it’s interesting let him complete

Chandler looks at Joey : You getting interested in history would itself be a pandemic.

Phoebe : Come on Chandler history is interesting. Ross you continue

Monica : Why don’t you just skip to the part how those were ended

Ross : You might not like my answer

Phoebe : That’s ok, we don’t like many things, for example your hair gel

Ross : Ok, don’t talk about my hair style

Joey : Come on Ross, tell us how this will end

Ross : Ok,  the initial Pandemics ended because no one else is left to die.

Joey : So we are all going to die? I thought out eating quite a few thing before I die

Phoebe : It’s ok Joey. You can die and still be eating in hell

Chandler : So you say that the human race is going to be wiped out because we couldn’t be less than 6 feet close to someone? 

Ross : Wait, that was a few thousand years ago. Then after a few years they invented Isolation or Quarantine like what we are doing right now . They would isolate people suffering from disease so that they don’t spread it to others.

Chandler : Ross, next time you sneeze, we will just isolate you

Ross : After a few years, they invented Vaccines, which are best. So this could end in any one of the above ways. 

Rachel : I wish someone comes up with a Vaccine quickly

Chandler : Joey why don’t you work on it?

Joey : If I ever have to work on a vaccine, it would be on how to eat more food

Monica : Speaking of food, let’s eat our dinner 

And everyone gathers around the dining table to have their food.


FRIENDS : The one in Quarantine - Part 4

Everybody is dull and watching TV  

Rachel : This is very bad, I can’t go to parlour and I look like a monster

Joe : I am not having proper food and sex , you are complaining about parlour

Monica stares at Joe and calls out “Joe”

Joe : What ? you are always hooking up with Chandler

Monica : I am talking about food

Joe : Sorry, I am having good food.

Ross Sneezes

Monica : Ross are you Ok?

Chandler : You said Dinosaurs are more immune than humans, looks like it isn’t the case

Ross : I am fine

Joe : That’s what every patient says

Ross : I am not a patient

Joe : Exactly ,  that’s what every patient says

Monica : Joe… will you shut up

Phoebe : Oh my god! This means, we all will get Corona. Ross why are you doing this to us?

Ross : I didn’t even step out last one week

Chandler: Corona can show symptoms 2 weeks after being affected

Ross and Monica looks angrily at Chandler 

Chandler : What, that’s what the news said

Monica : I think you should go and check this out

Ross : Come on, I just sneezed once

Chandler : Chill guys, even if Ross gets Corona, he can just divorce it

Joe and Chandler wink at each other and start laughing and Phoebe joins the laugh

Monica : You guys are mean, come on Ross, let’s get to the hospital

Ross shouts I am fine

Phoebe : Ok at least stay away from us, so that we are not affected.

Ross : This is outrageous, I just sneezed once and you are all going mad.

Phoebe : Is there anything that says, you need more than one sneeze to transfer Corona to others?

Joe : fair point

Joe : Ok, I have work to do and I am going back to my apartment

Ross : Wait, you are actually scared of my little sneeze? This is ridiculous

Joe : What, you guys work from home all the time and when I do the same, you have questions?

Ross : You are working from home?

Joe : No, but I have to practice for an audition

Monica : What audition is it exactly?

Chandler : May be a role in which he tries to escape from a patient affected with Corona

Joe and Chandler starts laughing again

Rachel : Ross, why don’t you just go to your apartment and stay there until you stop sneezing anymore?

Ross : Wait what?

Phoebe : Yeah she is right?

Ross : Humans do sneeze randomly until their death

Phoebe : So you say that you will go on spread corona until your death?

Monica : Stop it guys, maybe he is right. It is just a sneeze


FRIENDS : The one in Quarantine - Part 3

Everybody watching TV except ROSS and Chandler 


Monica : Guys, why don't you come and play with us. In Poker, more people more fun 

Chandler : I have a report pending to submit 

Ross : and I have a paper to submit to Paleontological Society 

Phoebe : Every office and business are closed. Why do you guys need to work? 

Ross : This is called working from home 

Joe : Like it's a real thing. What you are saying is like, cooking in the toilet or or  taking a bath in bedroom 

Chandler : Joe Stop 

Joe : Maybe I should start acting from home.  

Chandler : Can you act like a grown up for some days, we would really take it 

Phoebe : So you are getting paid now? This is unfair. I can massage from home as well. Probably I should ask them to come home 

Monica stares at Phoebe 

Phoebe : Don't worry I shall find a place elsewhere to massage clients

Monica : Wait, this is a great idea. I can cook food and still make money.  

Chandler : Isn't that what you are already doing with me. 

Monica : No that's not fair 

Chandler : Yes, you were using my credit card 

Joe : Does this mean I have to pay for food as well? 

Monica : Stop it guys. Seriously I could make some money 

Phoebe : Or you could do some charity. Like cooking food for free for people who can't afford food 

Chandler : Isn't she already doing with Joe 

Phoebe : I am serious. In my previous life when Plague was all over the world, there was this lady who served food packets to the needy people, she went straight to heaven after getting killed by Plague. 

Monica : I shall go and start cooking food. 

Phoebe : Chandler, since you are working from home, why don't you teach me what you do. So that I can get a similar job 

Joe : That's a nice idea 

Chandler : Sorry, This is tough to teach 

Phoebe : Come on Chandler, I can't ask Ross the same. His job is digging graves of dead animals and disrespecting them. I hate that 

Ross : Whaaaat? 

Phoebe : Yes, that's what you call it as "Fossil". Maybe after 100 years and you are dead, someone does this to your grave and calls them a fossil, then you will know. Chandler will you teach me or not? 

Chandler : Ok, this needs a lot of knowledge in Statistics and data base. Do you know them? 

Phoebe : I might 

Chandler : You might? If you know them, then I can help.  

Joe : Or I could teach you some acting, you can be a great Actor 

Phoebe : That's ok. I will settle with massages

Next Part